Newborn Feet

Newborn Feet

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Q & A part 1

I am sure as I continue in the process I will get asked questions.   That is fine, I would rather have friends/acquaintances that are knowledgeable about what I am doing rather than 'think' they know.  

This will be the first part of Q & A to answer some of the early questions that I have been asked either in person or in some other format.   When I am pregnant I am sure I will get many more - and those are the FUN ones!!

If you have questions, feel free to ask.  A lot of questions I might not have the answers to yet - others might change.  I'll do my best to keep you up to date.

Are you doing it for the same family as last time?
I wish!   No, their family is complete although I did give them a heads up that I was available again if they were interested.   ;-)  We have no idea at this point who we will be matched up with.

What are you waiting on right now?
Currently they are reviewing my application and ALL the pages that go with it - maybe I'll share the types of questions I get asked....   The agency is also doing a background check on Mark and I as well as credit checks.   Once we pass (I am being optimistic) we will wait for my next cycle and then we will travel down 7 to 14 days later for our medical screening and psych evaluations (MMPI).

So you are using an agency?
Absolutely!  I know there are plenty of surrogates that go 'independent' (ie - no agency), but this is not something I would legally want to take a chance on.  I used a wonderful agency out of LA last time and I plan on using them again.  I know them.  I trust them.  Even famous people use them - like Sarah Jessica Parker!   Woo-Hoo!   If you are interested, check out

Do they pick you or do you pick them?
Yes.   We will get one to three profiles to look through of potential IP's.  I can accept or reject (and ask for more) the profiles we get.  If I accept then *my* information will get sent to them for review.  If they decide they would like to continue then we will have a "match meeting".  Think of this as a blind date where you know you will get knocked up probably by the 3rd date. 

When are you getting pregnant?
Wish I knew!  It would sure make planning my summer a lot easier. 

How much does it cost?
The IP's need to put money into a trust that would pay for everything for the entire pregnancy.   This includes:  Medical screening for them and the surrogate, travel fee's (airline, hotel, food), psychological screening, all the fee's at the RE's office ($10k a pop!), medication for the surrogate, life insurance, medical insurance, lost wages for surrogate and partner, fees to the agency, surrogate's compensation, egg donor fees (if applicable), lawyers for the IP's and surrogate, and any other fees that I can't remember or come up during the course of the journey.   Is it expensive?  Yes.  Is it worth it?  You bet!  Is the family buying their baby as some would want to imply?  Did you just read that long list of things that are required?  Absolutely not!

So do you get paid?
I do get compensated.  Is it a lot?  Well, what is your definition of a lot?  Since I am a stay at home mom not making any money, sure.   The extra money will open up a few possibilities for our family.   Is it my main motivator, absolutely not.  I could get a job and make more money.   BUT - this way I still get to stay home with my children and still be able to afford a few little 'extras'.  Surrogates with my agency are screened to make sure that money is not a main motivator in deciding to help a family.  Remember, they have run credit checks on us and have verified that we are not on any type of public assistance (that would disqualify you).  I don't need to post the amount I will be getting, if you are that interested you can go look it up.  :)  
A quick statement here - when we decided that I was going to pursue another surrogacy Mark and I discussed what we wanted to do with the money.  A goal of mine has been to go back to school after the kids all going to school - it would coordinated almost to Mark being eligible to retire.  With the money that I will be receiving we plan on setting it aside so that I can pay for a good chunk of school without going into debt.  Perfect!

Is it (referring to the baby I am assuming) going to be related to you?
Absolutely not.  I am a gestational carrier/surrogate - that means that I am using someone else's eggs - either the IM or an ED.  I will not be related in any way, shape or form to the baby.

Ok, that is good for now - I'll continue another time!


  1. Thanks for sharing! What an interesting process.

  2. I couldn't even think of any questions, and I thought these were good ones.


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