"Due Date" Tomorrow!!

Wow, I can't even believe it...... tomorrow is my 'guess date'!!!

I have so many thoughts and so many directions to go.......

The other night I took a nice long bath and spent most of the time reminiscing about where I was emotionally just 36 weeks ago.   How much I have been stretched both physically and emotionally and spiritually.  I have grown so much........  
I still think about Sophie & Pepe often and I pray that they have gotten their perfect match and even better would be if they are awaiting their own little bundle of joy.  I have not forgotten.  I will never forget. 

Withing the next couple days we will be welcoming our Little Intruder into our home and into our lives.   We will love completely and fully without any hesitation!!  This journey did not end as it was planned by me  -  but I think we have all learned and grown.

When I got out of the bath the other night my husband asked me "are you ready to have that baby yet?".   My answer took him by surprise, but I guess that is the difference between a man and a woman.   I answered "physically I am ready to be done.... emotionally, I still need some time."  He doesn't understand that emotionally I need to close this chapter and it has to be done on my terms, not on anyone else's.  I need to be okay with being done being pregnant..... he said - "why does it matter, the baby will still be here".   I guess I view pregnancy, labor and childbirth different then a lot of people.  I enjoy being pregnant.   Sure, I have been having some major discomfort, but that doesn't mean that I don't love it.   I lay awake at night just feeling all the little rolls, bumps and pokes.   I love to lift my shirt up and watch the baby move.  I love when my daughter comes up below my belly to give her baby a hug and a kiss.   Those are things that won't happen once I am no longer pregnant.   This baby also needs NO care right now - I don't have to feed it.  I don't' have to change diapers on him/her.  I don't have to soothe it to sleep.  I don't have to tell the kids "NO!".  I don't have to be 'grounded' to my house for 2 weeks yet........... I am look forward to most of those things, but I am not sure if I am ready yet!!!

One of the things holding me back from 'relaxing' enough to have the baby right now is the slow recovery my husband is having from his surgeries.   His hernia surgery is taking a bit more recovery than he thought it would take.  He is still feeling quite a bit of pain and is slow moving around.   I want him to be able to help and feel good when this baby comes.  I don't want him to be in pain while he is trying to be my main support person.

One nice thing about my husband's surgery - he has been home.  It has been nice to have had some down time as a family.   We aren't doing any sports right now (very intentional move) so the evenings have just been us at home.   Ahhhh!!   *smile*


So, we'll see.  I am not sure when the Little One will make their debut, I am still expecting some sort of surprise.......   My body has been ready.   It is large, swollen and doing what it needs to do to bring this baby into the world.  Our bedroom has been transformed into a little medical corner with all the things we need for the birth.  My video camera is charged up and ready to film the birth.   My blessingway has been done and we have lots of wonderful family and friends waiting in the wings......  
My children are anxiously awaiting their new sibling.   We all watched my daughter's birth video yesterday and none of my children were scared.  I showed them that I don't yell and scream.   I am calm but might make funny noises.   We talked about the baby being born in the water and when the placenta comes out that the water might get some blood in it.  Zeyon has even decided that he will sit on our bed and wait for the baby (before he was just going to play outside).   Sheridan has her seat picked out along side the tub and Tilor.... I'm not sure what his plans are.  I think he would be just fine watching, but I won't force him to do anything.  I'll let him take the lead.  When Mark and I crawled into bed last night and he says "let's talk about spellings".... so that was a fun conversation.  We both agreed on first and middle names for the boy, but the girl we both visualized differently.   Finally he said "well, at least I know".   I think that means I win........... *wink*  We'll find out!

Guess it is up to me to release this baby. 
                                I'll try to at least post a quick note about our baby's arrival.  Details would follow at another time.    I am excited!!  I really am!   Come out and play baby!!   I can't believe it is time!!!!!!

Blessingway ~ Belly Blessing

**WARNING**  Image Heavy!!

This past weekend I was eternally blessed by a handful of positive, beautiful women that support me and the way that my family chooses to welcome our babies.  Most of the moms have had their babies at home, a few of them are also expecting.  So what is a Blessingway?   This is the way my friend Sarah described it:  A gathering of women celebrating the miracle of birth, pregnancy, motherhood and womanhood....but definitely NOT like a traditional baby shower!!  


I was looking for a way to honor this pregnancy and our Little Intruder, but something different than I had ever done.   I really *loved* the idea of getting henna on my belly and told a few friends.   One of those friends suggested I research Blessingway's.   A Blessingway can be personalized in so many different ways - I wanted one that everyone would feel comfortable at.  I decided not to burn incense, not to do any chants and not to put burnt sage on my friends foreheads.   *smile*   Just a little out of my comfort zone and that of most of my friends.  

My blessingway was simple, comfortable and just PERFECT!  I would love to share pictures with you from my special day.   

This is me!

Sarah - who introduced me to Blessingway and helped me play my special day!

Tanya - my *best* Mommy friend I have!

Sabrina - She just had her first homebirth just a couple months ago!

Khaira - My niece by marriage.  I was honored to be at her VBAC

and the first birth I was ever got to see in person!

My friend Joy who thought we were all crazy to have homebirths....

and in July just had her first homebirth!

Kristin who I have known for over 15 years and has a habit of having children in cars.  ;-)  She is expecting baby #4 and is planning a homebirth this time!

This is KaShan who has had all 3 of her kids at home and just found out she is expecting twin girls!  Her mom is also my midwife!

This is my beautiful Momma!!!

So that is a quick introduction of most of the people at my Blessingway -  Here are a few shots of the Henna that we all got to have.   It was so fun!!

My BIG beautiful belly!!!

 Henna on the hands was a popular option!

 I love paisleys!

 Two paisleys representing the 2 girls she is carrying. 

 This is Sasha!   Simple & Gorgeous!

 Totally 'outside the box' and so pretty!!

 Hands & feet with my belly.

Everyone (but Joy...) with their henna!!

So after the henna we finally did introductions and then each person presented me with some beads.  Beads were brought so that a birth support necklace could be put together..... 

This is one example. (Notice the KangaRoo!)

The idea is to bring a bead that reminds the giver of me.... or would remind me of the giver.... or would signify something about our relationship. Once I get a good picture of the necklace I will post it - it turned out GORGEOUS!! It is amazing the thought and love that went into each bead & charm that was picked out!!

This is a *great* place to get a blessingway necklace if you are interested!!  She was also the person that came out and did our Henna tattoos, so if you are in the Portland area, drop her a message!

The last big part of the Blessingway was the wrist binding for the labor support bracelets.  We started in a circle with some red wool yarn and went back and forth across the circle wrapping the 'string' around out wrist in a show of solidarity.   The idea is that every time one of us looks at the bracelets we will think positive thoughts for labor and delivery for me and the baby.  

 Sarah bound and KaShan waiting -

 My mom, Michelle & Sasha bound -

 Wrapped & ready -

 Tanya with Baby G

 Of course I wanted one too!

Then we stepped back and watched the web grow.   After we took scissors and helped each other tie off their bracelets (or anklets if they chose to move them).   When my children returned home each of the boys chose to have a bracelet and my daughter wrapped her ankle.   After my husband came home from his surgeries he asked for his bracelet as well *warm fuzzies*.   Last night I got a message from Khaira; her 4 year old daughter wanted one as well, so they created a red bracelet for her as well.   The web of support grows!!

Good labor/delivery vibes should be thought when you look at the bracelets which will be worn until the the Little Intruder is born. When the word gets out that they baby has arrived safely each woman will 'cut the cord'.

 The final element that I chose to have at my Blessingway was to have one of my friends and supporters pray over me.   I had asked Sasha before hand to do this for me.   She was one of the first people I sent a message to when I found out I was pregnant.  I didn't say what was going on, but I told her I needed prayers.   To have her pray over me on this special day was like we had come full circle.  The anticipation and excitement that we have now is soooo much more positive then it was 9 months ago.  

I had such an incredible day!!!

Thank you to the women that supported me and loved me throughout my entire pregnancy and thank you to this core group of women that came and supported me at my Blessingway!!

Snip-snip

Just a very short post  -  I hope to post more in the next couple days about a wonderful Blessingway I had on Saturday!!

For tonight though... it is about my husband.   Tomorrow I take him in to repair 2 small hernias he has and after much talking we decided that the best thing to do would be to undergo a vasectomy while he is 'under'.

This is what we want.  We have talked about it over and over, it just never got done before.  Once I found out I was pregnant he said "guess I should go have that vasectomy done".   Better late than never I guess......

But then tonight it kind of hit me.  Yes, I am a little hormonal as it is, but I am really struggling with this right now.   This is permanent.  This is real.  This means we are Done.   Done, done.   That is really hard.

As I drove my kids to my friends house for the evening (we leave pretty early in the morning) I told my hubby I was sad.   And then the stupid tears started.......... Totally didn't expect that.   But I verbalized it.  I said it out loud.  That made it real.  No more kids for us after this little intruder.   {and the tears start again..... dang it!}

Of course we are all haveing fun joking and playing about it - drawing faces down there, making notes, putting X's and saying "do not remove" things like that...... the surgery is about getting the small hernias fixed, but this "small, second surgery" is sure doing a number on my emotions.

Now yes, people think we are NUTS (no pun intended!) for planning the surgery this close to my due date, but really, if the baby arrives 'on time' - somewhere around February 1st then that will give my husband a week to recuperate before taking over the primary care taker roll for me.   He already has plans to be home for 2 weeks after the baby arrives, so this will give him a total of 3 weeks to rest and heal.   That is way more than he would ever do for either surgery separate or together.   So, we are saying a prayer that I can make it over the hill into 'the city', have the surgeries and make it home tomorrow afternoon.   One more week before baby arrives would be nice......

sorry for the horrible sentence structure, run on sentences and fragments.

Check Please!

For the last two weeks I have been in 'final prep mode' and it is paying off!!   My list labeled "Baby To Do" has fewer and fewer things that don't have a check mark next to them.   The important things are done, the necessities are prepared and if I had the baby today then I would be totally fine.   Ok, except for the part that I am emotionally not ready, but that is another story.........

I am going to share my list with you.   Yes, it might seem like a lot but really in the grande scheme of things, I am probably more prepared than I need to be, that is just the way I operate.

**Diapers - I was asked to have my cloth diapers on hand for my postpartum bleeding (much softer than traditional pads).  These are the old chinese prefolds like my mom used for diapers.   They also make great burp cloths. 
**FuzziBunz - These are the diapers I use after the first month or so.  Love them!
**Kissaluvs - The diapers I use after the ONE package of disposable diapers we use - smaller size, easier for newborns.
**Receiving blankets - Pretty basic, this is what we wrap the baby in after s/he comes out of the bathtub and is dried off.
**Baby Clothes - I asked my oldest to get 4 boy outfits and 4 girl outfits out of the boxes.... he came back with all neutral clothes that him and his brother & sister helped pick out.   *shrug*   Oh well........ guess we'll wait to see what we have and THEN get the clothes out.  
**Changing pad - Not that we ever change diapers on these, but I have one and they are nice to have around.
**Bassinet - We decided to skip the cradle in our room this time (don't use it anyway) but it is nice to have something to lay the baby in downstairs while I cook dinner or something.   This white wicker bassinet we use is special because it was sent to us from my surrogate family.   Mark (my husband) and Dada when shopping and picked it up together to use for Ethan.  When we got pregnant with Zeyon they sent it up to us.   *Warm Fuzzies*
**Couch - Once we took the tree down we moved the couch we had in our room since LAST Christmas back down to the livingroom.   Wow - my room has lots of room now!!
**Carseat - I am super anal about car seat installation and since I waited too long I couldn't get in and properly install the carseat with my big ol' preggo belly.   One of my girlfriends heard me say I was going to take it down to the police station and she volunteered her equally anal hubby.   So - he installed it for me just the other day!  I still need to put up the 'rear view mirror'....

Now the stuff that is still 'to be done' doesn't seem that long - I need to get a little bit more of a stock up for groceries since I can't leave the house for 2 weeks.  Directions to and from the hospital to my house need to be put up on my fridge 'just in case'.  Our cameras need to be charged and ready to go!   We cannot find our video camera's charger right now and it is driving us nuts!!  When our daughter was born we had the camera up on the towel rack and when I knew I was close I yelled at Mark "hit record!" so we were able to record the birth from a distance.  I have watched it a few times since then and it is so nice to know I have it.  Oh yes, and I need to get my sheets and waterproof mattress pad on my bed - probably a couple layers so I can just take off one layer and have a clean one underneath.  Again, something I have never needed, but nice to have just in case.

Not my supplies, but a reasonable facsimile.

I also have the all important REAL birth supplies ready and set up on a table (and changing pad) in my room.  I have everything from those little fingernail scrubbers with cleaner built in to a peri bottle.  Mesh panties to chux pads.   Maxi pads to cord clamps.  Crock pot to receiving blankets.  Newborn screening kit to a hand knitted baby hat.  Bowl for the placenta to a shower curtain.   Gloves to thermometers.  What I don't have on hand the midwives will be bringing including the oxygen, pitocin, baby scale and medical charts. 

The time is fast approaching.  My due date is 13 days away.   I am *praying* to make it to my due date.  My husband gets the pleasure of having a few surgeries this coming Tuesday (one week before my due date!) - 2 small hernia's and a vasectomy.   For most people this would be fine - surgeries happen in hospitals and babies are born in hospitals.  Not me.  Since we have to travel over the the mountain 2 hours (each direction!) to the hospital I am hoping to get over the hill and get back still pregnant!  Worse case scenario - I have an emergency birth kit in my car that is well stocked, I would just have to do it all on my own.  I can do that if I need to......... just not idea.  My husband is going to be a *little* sore for the first week and I really want to give him all the time he needs to recoup before the Little Intruder is born.  He plans on staying home with the baby and I for the first 2 weeks and be my caregiver (ahhh, gotta love the guy!), so hopefully that extra 2 weeks that he isn't running around at work will give him more opportunity to heal up.   If his surgery and me giving birth happen too close together we might have some issues......

Until then - I need to go get some more things checked off my list.  Better go find that rear facing mirror......

Oh yes - I did have my check up today too - everything was 'just perfect!'.  Head down but not engaged (that is great right now!), back along my left side and a relatively small head (yippe!!).  Ok, off to look for the mirror.........

A little size comparison - just for fun!

So I have been saying for some time that I feel smaller this time around.   At my appointment last Wednesday I told my midwife I was curious as to how I was measuring compared to the last two - today she called and gave me a few numbers.

 Here they are: 

Zeyon - 10lbs, 4ozs born on his due date
At 36 weeks my fundal height was 37
At 39.2 weeks my fundal height was 43 - a gain of 6 in 3 weeks!
Total weight gain - 40 lbs

Sheridan - 9lbs, 2ozs born 7 hours past her due date
At 36 weeks my fundal height was 40
At 39.2 weeks my fundal height was 42 - a gain of 2 in 3 weeks!
Total weight gain - 50 lbs

At my appointment last week (36.1 weeks) my fundal height was 39 and my weight gain this far has been 32.   Very interesting.  I am amazed at how closely I am following the last 2 pregnancies.   Even though I feel smaller I am actually measuring bigger than Z and smaller than S.   Obviously the last 3 weeks can make a difference!  I think I still have to go with my gut and say this baby might be smaller, but *really* - I have no reason to say that.  I must just be getting used to packing kids around!!  

I will be closing our baby poll this weekend, so if you want to make a guess and you haven't yet - NOW is the time!!!     Here is the link one last time - http://www.expectnet.com/games/Intruder   (You can also find a direct link on the side of the blog - big orange box!

DeLurking -

Oh yeah, and apprently this week you are supposed to 'delurk'.... not sure why, but it sounds like a good way to start off the new year to me!  

You don't have to delurk permanently, but if you are brave - drop a message or a question or comment.   *smile*    Have a wonderful year - I am sure it is going to be one of great adventure!!

2, 4, 6, 8 - 32

Nope, not the secret to my safe or my locker - something much better!

Two is the number of children that I got to help bless another family with.

The number of kids that will soon be running wild in my house!!

The number of children that (very soon) I have given birth to.

The number of children that I have carried in my womb for some amount of time.  I carried one little one to 12 weeks along with his/her brother before a reduction was performed and another little one I lost between 5 and 7 weeks.   Eight beautiful children I have carried and loved..... pretty awesome!!

Thirty-two.    

That is how much weight I have gained so far this pregnancy.   Yeah, not nearly as special as my other numbers, but significant nonetheless.   My husband and I ended up watching some smut celebrity weight loss show the other day and they featured one of the previous playboy bunnies and talked about her gaining 65lbs with her first pregnancy.... so my hubby asks the *wonderful* question:   "So have much have you gained?"

With the first 3 kiddos I gained 29, 30 and 31 pounds.   With my youngest son I gained 40 and with my daughter I gained nearly 50.  If you recall not to long again I was getting down about all the junk in my trunk I have been carrying around this pregnancy.... but really, with less than 4 weeks to go I don't think I am doing so bad!  I hit a plateau at 25lbs which I thought was great - and then Thanksgiving came, my birthday came and who knows how many Christmas parties there were!   So, I added on a few pounds then too.   If you remember I don't obsess about my weight, but I do monitor it.  I have read about some people just stressing out about it - really?   You are GROWING A CHILD!!!   

In other news my 36 week check up was great!!  My belly measured about 39 and my iron level was still above 11!!  Woot!!!  I checked myself before the appointment and really don't see where I have dilated at all, which is fine by me.  We worked on some more paperwork and talked about a few 'what if' situations.   Baby weight guess was 6.5 - 7lbs, which is maybe *just* over the average of 6lbs.   Then again - none of my kids are 'average', so it was perfect!   Every Wednesday I'll be having my check ups.   Last night I decided to try out the Contraction Monitor (not the real name) app on my iPod - very cool!  I was able to email my contraction history for an hour (that is how long I monitored it for) to one of my midwives who deemed it 'good pre-labor'!

Although I love Christmas, I am ready for it to be done and out of my house - so tomorrow hopefully the rest of the stuff will be taken down including the tree!  My 'to do' list for baby is getting longer and longer and getting the tree out and my living room cleaned up is at the top of my list.   Well, that and the 9 loads of laundry sitting on my couch to be folded..... Ugh.   I did manage to work on our upstairs (which is just our bedroom and bathroom) the other day.   Got out the birth supplies that I have left from the last time and just tonight I ordered a few other necessities to have on hand.  Since I'll be spending the first week upstairs I want it looking half way decent - since I can't leave all the visitors will probably be coming up.  I got stuff put away, now it just needs a good cleaning.   Maybe after all the laundry is done......

Aches & Pains

One of the biggest pregnancy complaints you hear about is all the aches and pains that go along with it.........  There are many other um, unpleasant things that go along with most pregnancies, but unless you are Jenny Garth you probably won't discuss them in a casual setting.  If you do, it will be amongst your closest friends!

So what happens to your body during the pregnancy?

Well, after the gas stage passes and the puking stage passes you are left with a tiny human that is growing and taking over your midsection.  Your balance is thrown off, you might be a bit more clumsy.  Might not be able to put on your socks or your shoes very easily.   When you drop something on the floor you hope you are talented enough to pick it up with your toes or have a child close by to ask them for assistance.   They are closer to the floor as it is, right?

Now that I am in my 35th week I can say that I have definitely experience some aches and pains along the way.   For the most part, unless is *bad* I don't complain a whole lot.   Really, how can your body go through such drastic changes and NOT shift, move, tweak, hurt, etc?

 So what hurts?  For me personally; this time around I haven't had too many problems.  My biggest complaint has to be that I have had a couple days that my crotch is KILLING me!!  I feel like I need to just push it all back together.   The worst was probably after I sat on a {not very cushy} bar stool for 7 hours wrapping Christmas presents!   Oh - OUCH!   My back was also bothering me a bit that time too.   I know that my pelvis widens up and my hips tweak themselves out a bit too and that is probably part of the migration....  Nothing like a soft squishy couch to relax on when it was all said and done!!

My second biggest complaint that I don't talk a whole lot about is a spot on my right side that I have pains at.  I truly believe I have needle tract endometriosis.  After a whole lot of research it is the only thing I have come up with that can be causing me pain.  With my second surrogacy I had an amino done and in each pregnancy since then I have had pain where the needle went in for the amino.  Even with this pregnancy I had a shooting pain before I even knew I was pregnant and I thought "Wow, that was weird, I normally only get pain there when I am pregnant."   {Duh.}   Anyway, I am not sure all the details, but it just feels like my uterus is attached to my side by a string somehow and if I move too much, took quickly or stretch funny it hurts.   When I am not pregnant it has never bothered me.    I actually called the doctor that did my amnio and he told me how many thousands of patients he had had and had never had a complaint.......  Kind of coincidental dontcha think?  

OK - I am sparing you the pictures on the next topic that I hear a lot of complaints about.... hemorrhoids.    Yeah, those nasty things.   Now since I have had *way* more children than most of my friends (kidding.... Kind of) I get a lot of people that ask me for my opinions or thoughts on certain pregnancy topics.  I *totally* don't mind this at all!!   However it seems like more times than not I get people that ask me about hemorrhoids.   When I tell them that that is one topic I have NO idea about, they sometimes get mad at me!  "How can you have had "x" amount of babies and NOT had hemorrhoids?!?!?"   *shrug* 
I have no idea - how did you get them???   So I thank my lucky stars that while my butt might be getting fatter, it doesn't have those.  For those of you that get them, have them or might get them - I am really sorry, but I have no suggestions for you.  

The thing keeping me up most nights is heartburn.   Stupid thing.   Another symptom that ONLY happens when I am pregnant!   Now I know that TUMS would be the nice simple answer, but too many can actually cause your placenta to start to calcify which then in turn makes your placenta have 'dead' spots which can no longer filter and provide nutrients to your baby.   So - I have tried the papaya enzymes that were suggested to me, but I can't seem to get those to work.   I really don't want to drink the apple cider vinegar, so I suffer or break down and have ONE antacid and try to go back to sleep.

I get tired and out of breath a lot.  If I have to go upstairs I normally sit and rest once I get up there.   I am lucky that my shower has a seat in it - 'cuz I have to sit in the middle of my shower.   Today I took my kids to to the store and had to get really low to look at the price tag on something and just decided to sit and rest while I was down there.   Unfortunately I scared one of the workers when she saw this huge preggo sitting on the floor...... next time I'll try hiding better!

So yes, I could whine and complain a lot or I can suck it up and say - your know what, it isn't easy growing a small child!   I don't like to complain.  I don't want to sound like a crotchety old lady.   :)  My body is doing the BEST job that it can do and I am happy with that!   Sure, if I had quit after 2 kids I wouldn't be complaining at all, but this way one family has 2 kids and my family is working on number 4!   

That is pretty awesome!   My body was made to have babies!!!  


Being pregnant isn't always easy but then -  take a minute to think about all the women that would trade places with you and all your aches and pains in a heartbeat just to have ONE child......... 

I know I am blessed! 

Merry Christmas!!

Christmas is fast approaching and so is the New Year.  Time to do a quick update - and why not at 4am since I am  not sleeping?  It is officially Christmas Eve!!!

Six years ago my husband and I were anxiously awaiting our first (biologically ours!) child together.  My due date:  December 26th.   Our first planned homebirth.  The set up was the same as this year, Christmas Eve on Friday, Christmas Saturday and the due date on Sunday.   My husband, Mark works Sunday through Thursday and kept hoping I would have the baby so he wouldn't have to go back to work on Sunday.... no such luck. 

We spent Christmas Eve with his side of the family and Christmas day with my side.   I took a nice long, relaxing bath that night and went to bed.  I woke up (without looking back at 'notes') a little after 9am (maybe 9:30....)on my due date, and had a couple contractions.  I went down stairs with my *very* attentive 5 year old, Tilor in tow.  I got the big giant clock off our wall and had Ti bring me the phone after I dropped to my knees for a contraction.   While I was on the phone calling Mark he was in charge of getting me some ice water.   I remember very specifically calling Mark and saying:  "I think I want you to come home right now."   His response.......... "Call me back when you know for sure."   Seriously?!?!?!   Do you know how hard it was to call you NOW???

I don't remember anymore who called our midwife, but Mark did come right home from work.  I think our MW arrived about 10:15am.  I was already in the tub and Tilor was sitting on one end of it (it is a garden tub...with the 'counter' around the edge of it) and staring very intently at me and saying:  "I'll let you know if the baby comes out, okay mom?"   Gee, thank you son!   *smile*

Our son Zeyon Christopher was born at 10:50 am.   Our backup midwife didn't make it, but that was fine - everything went very well.   When we finally got out of the tub and snuggled into bed and the midwives had made us breakfast we weighed him - he was a whopping 10lbs 4ozs!!

This is one of my favorite pictures because if you look at his ears you can see that they are folded up.   All his weight in utero pushed his shoulders up to his ears and molded them that way for quite awhile.  In this picture he is 2 days old.   He never was a thumb suckers, so it is interesting that he was in this picture....

So, as we celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ on Christmas Day, I also look forward to this time of year of celebrating the birth of our son, Zeyon Christopher (pronounced just like "Ian", but with a Z sound) the day after.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

And in other news - I celebrated my birthday 2 weeks ago.  I turned 33!!   To celebrate I decided to kidnap my husband!  I planned a night away for just the TWO of us.   If you recall we took a mini vacation back in February when Mark and I flew to LA for medical screening.  Before that, it had been 6 years since we had ever gone away ALONE!   I figured if I didn't plan something *now* that it would be another 3+ years before we could escape.  My mom helped out again - I dropped them all off at her house on Thursday evening and went home to wait for Mark.  All our stuff was packed in my car - ready to go!  When he got home at 7:30pm or so I literally met him at the door with clean clothes and told him "Go get changed we're going out!"   He was NOT thrilled.   We went back and forth a few times and I think he realized that they kids were gone and I was serious that he had to just suck it up.  *smile*   I allowed him a shower but told him he couldn't shave (I had already packed all that up!).   He assumed we were going out for dinner, so I didn't tell him anything different.   We drove an hour south and went to Lincoln City and stayed in a Junior Suite with an ocean front view.   A few times during the 24 hours he said "Thanks...." so that made me feel good.  I knew what we were doing was important for US!!!    

Here is a picture of us on the morning of my birthday on the balcony of the hotel - looking tired, but thrilled!

When we finally went to pick up the kids my mom and the little ones had  made me a birthday cake and my step-dad made his *wonderful* stroganoff.   It was a GREAT birthday!! 
*I also got a phone call from the surro-Daddy and he wished me a very Happy Birthday!!   He was in New York for work but didn't want me not to hear from them.  See, it is the little things that make me smile!!!

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Ok, so baby update real quick...... I am 34 weeks!!!
I had my checkup on Wednesday and things are looking great.   Baby growth has slowed down a little (totally fine and normal), I was only measuring 36 weeks.  She hasn't said anything about the baby being big at all this time around.... kind of surprised.  Maybe she is just assuming it is big, but 'normal' for me.  My oldest, Tilor got to go to this appointment with me 'cuz he was out of school - he loves them!  He misses not being at all of them...... This time he was able to listen to him/her with the fetoscope and she also showed him how to manipulate my belly so he could feel the back and then all the 'parts' - arms, knees, feet etc.  She also showed him how she could tell the Little Intruder was in a head down position and how to put his hand around the head and move gently.   Makes me SMILE!!!

My last belly shot was at 25 weeks - so here is a new one.   34 weeks - and here I am in all my glory!!

I know I look big to most people but I actually feel smaller this time around......

If you haven't voted on our online baby poll, please feel free!  I love the fact that we had a few brave souls that are 'silent blog stalkers' come and vote!  On the main page of blog on the right side there is a bright orange box that will take you to our voting area.   We are at 56 guesses right now and if I remember correctly we are *very* close in boy/girl ratios!!   I think we'll be closing it around the 15th of January so you have only a couple weeks left!!!

This will probably be my last update for 2010 - wow, what a ride it has been!!!   Thanks for following along and I look forward to 2011!!!   Have a Merry Christmas and a wonderful, safe New Years!!

Ignore the dirty mirror - cleaning day was the next day!!  :)

31 week check-up

My apologies for not updating more often....... I have been being harassed that I needed an update, so here ya go - two updates in one day!! 

I had my 31 week check-up today and all is growing well!   We took my blood pressure a couple times (ok, 3 times) 'cuz the numbers seemed awfully close together and low.... but not something that we are too concerned about right now. My glucose was a bit high in my urine so we'll check that again next time.... probably all the cheesecake I have been eating since Thanksgiving!   Ooops.

Baby is pretty much standing on his/her head and today was posterior.  That changes almost daily!   I am measuring 36 weeks - so 5 weeks ahead.  My midwife has a theory about moms with toddlers/small children - she thinks that the body naturally increases the amniotic fluid to create an extra cushion for all those times they jump on your lap, need a snuggle or just bump you the wrong way.  I notice when I am laying down that my belly has gotten 'wider' this time.  Baby seems to be just the right size, it is my belly that is big.   I figure my uterus has stretched out and it is just ready and waiting for the baby to grow into it.  

We had a nice chat and I asked about getting birth supplies ready.  Over the next couple appointment we'll make sure I have the list of things I need to have on hand.  The biggest at this point is food so I can have a really good meal after the birth.   I plan on delivering in my bathtub (although she recommended a birth tub this time around so I had more room) where my last 2 were born.   My bed stays clean and comfy.  My room has supplies 'just in case' but otherwise we have towels, something to cut and clamp the cord after it stops pulsing and .....yeah, not much else.   Oh well, I guess the fishnet panties and pads.....  *smile*  

*Just to clarify - my midwives bring all the important supplies - oxygen, pitocin, sutures etc

in case there would be any type of complication!!**

My next appointment is scheduled for December 22nd (3 weeks away) and then January 5th.  After that we will be getting together every week for the next month until the baby is born.   Wow.   Amazing.

Two months from now.....

I am due two months from now....... how did that even happen?!?  

Last week I hit 30 weeks - 3/4 of the way through.  Only a quarter of this pregnancy left........ I am starting to get sad.  I really wish I could go back in time (with my sanity intact) and start this pregnancy over again.   I feel cheated.   I know it was my own fault and my own hormones, my own sadness etc that made the first 16 weeks really hard on me, but now I want to do it all over again. 

I want to celebrate getting a positive pregnancy test.  I want to have people be excited for me that I am pregnant.  I want to *wonder* with my husband 'are we?'.    But now I am here, so I have to enjoy this time I have left.

I know since it took so long for me to wrap my head and my heart around having a new baby in our house that I *might* have a hard time letting go.... I am kind of anticipating going over my 'guess date' just because I want to be pregnant and love on this baby as much as possible.  Then again, I can't wait to meet him/her!!!

My Guess Date is two months from today.  February 1st.   These last 9 weeks will FLY by, I am sure with the holidays fast approaching.   Our families have lots of birthdays this month including mine on the 10th and our son, Zeyon's the day after Christmas. 

Two weeks ago I went on a 'purge' trip and got rid of unnecessary furniture in my house that I felt was just too much.   We got rid of a couple coffee tables (baby will be learning to walk before you know it!), a train table, a chair, a desk and then we cleaned the WHOLE house.  Felt sooo nice!   My hubby kept rolling his eyes at me when I told him I wanted to get stuff ready for the baby.... we have almost 3 months still!!   "Time will go quicker than you think sweetie......."

So in order for us to prepare for our new little Intruder the only thing we NEEDED was a new car seat.  I am a little anal when it comes to car seat safety (drives the hubby nuts).  We have 2 car seats that we got when Zeyon was on his way and we had *great* timing and passed them down to Sheridan before they expired.  Well......... now we have a new baby on the way and two pretty nice looking seats that are expired.   Time to get a new one.   *Smile*   We have always gotten 2 identical seats - one for each of our rigs.  Makes it easy for the kids (they know which seat is theirs) and easy on us, we know how to work them easily.   This time around we only have ONE rig that will seat our entire family of six.   Yeah - May 9th of this year we got my hubby a 'new' truck  and it seats 5.  Perfect for us until the 28th of May when I found out we were expecting a new baby......... of course.  So this time around we are getting one seat.  I can always use one of the older ones for an emergency backup.   Oh yeah - we always get convertible seats.  I *really* dislike the infant seats.  My initial thoughts are 'pop in, pop out'.  I know they won't pass safety tests if that happened, but still....... My other thoughts are - I want to hold my child.  Sometimes it is a pain, but I make it work.  'You'll wake the baby if you take it out of the car seat'    Yeah, and they go right back to sleep.   (just my personal opinion - doesn't work for everybody!)

So this is how the cost of our new baby breaks down........

Feeding: Boob
Sleeping: Our bed
Toys: Siblings
Clothes: Boxes of boy/girl clothes just waiting to see......
Diapers/wipes - cloth. Spent about $600 six years ago and I have gotten LOTS of use out of them. Awesome since most people spend $2,000+ per kid on disposable diapers!! 
Price of having a new baby: $112.50 for the new car seat. :)
...I am happy!

9 Years Ago....

9 years ago today I became a surrogate.   I gave birth to a child that was not biologically mine.  A child I carried for someone else.  A child I got to hand over to the parents and watch their entire world change..... I got to be there.  I got to be a part of something HUGE.   I gave birth to a baby boy that weighed 8lbs 11ozs and came after just a very quick 45 minutes of labor & delivery. 
{As you can tell by this bruised face - it was quick!}

I became a surrogate and it changed my life.

Today Harrison Asher turns 9 years old.  He is having a football party with his friends and his younger brother Ethan.   Today 9 years ago two wonderful men became Daddy & Dada.   Today 9 years ago woman who thought she might never have grandchildren got to meet her grandson for the first time.  9 years ago men and women became aunts and uncles.   9 years ago a special little boy was born.

What an incredible thing *I* got to be a part of.  What an incredible blessing to me. 

IP's and surrogates all have different arrangements when they are in the hospital for labor and delivery.   Some share a room but it seems like most IP's get a room down the hall from the surrogate.  I get it, I really do, but for us - it wouldn't have worked.   The first night we got stuck in a standard tiny room.  Not really the best set up.   My IP's actually went home that night and I kept the baby with me.   Apparently they had quite a few friends that thought they were nuts and that I might run off with the baby.... um, no.   There is that whole TRUST thing again.   Besides, I was already doing the single mom thing by that point and *really* didn't want a newborn baby to take care of!   The second night we got a 2 bedroom suite and it was wonderful!   We could close the door if either one of us wanted privacy, but I'm not sure we ever did.   (ok, maybe at night 'cuz I snored so bad.....)   I nursed Harrison the entire time I was in the hospital and the dads made sure to take lots of picture to prove that they hadn't deprived him of getting a little boob action!   ;-)  

My experience was wonderful.  I loved the family and knew that we would be doing a sibling journey sometime in the future, so to me it wasn't the end, it was just another chapter in our lives together.